DOUBLE-ENTENTE

Shortly after the language bill was passed unanimously in the Congress to become a law that would provide a better understanding of the business transactions for inexperienced non-English local speakers, the President technically vetoed it because she found the translations were not only too embarrassing and scary but also very vulgar and obscene.

Below are the few samples of the accounting terms, with what the locals would likely take as the appropriate double-entente in parenthesis:

Asset - Ari (popularly referred to as the male organ)
Fixed asset - Nakatirik na ari (organ in erection)
Liquid asset - Basang ari (wet organ)
Solid asset - Matigas na ari (hardened organ)
Owned asset - Sariling pag aari (one’s organ)
Other asset - Ari ng iba (other’s organ)
False asset - Ari-ari-an (tiny organ)
Miscellaneous asset - Iba-ibang klaseng ari (different kinds of organ)
Asset write off - Pinutol na pag aari (dismembered organ)
Depreciation of asset - Laspag na pag aari (wilted or worn-out organ)
Fully depreciated asset - Laspag na laspag na pag aari (organ in its worst lamentable state)
Earning asset - Tumutubong pag aari (hardening organ)
Working asset - Ganado pa ang ari (already satisfied organ)
Non-earning asset - Baldado na ang ari (already exhausted or over-used organ)
Erroneous entry - Mali ang pagka pasok (penetrated by error)
Double entry - Dalawang beses ipinasok (penetrated two times)
Multiple entry - Labas pasok nang labas pasok (in and out in succession)
Correcting entry - Itinama ang pagpasok (rectifying the penetration)
Reversing entry - Baligtad ang pagkakapasok (penetration by the rear)
Dead asset - Patay na ARI (The ORGAN is dead and kaput!)