A Rastaman dies and goes to Heaven.
He is at the Pearly Gates and is met by St. Peter himself. But the gates are closed as RasI approaches the gatekeeper..
St. Peter said, 'Well, You seem to be in the wrong place as you not listed in the Book of Life.
But as there is such a crowd behind you and it would cause such a disruption I will give you an entrance examination if you pass it I will let you in.
St. Peter said, 'Well, You seem to be in the wrong place as you not listed in the Book of Life.
But as there is such a crowd behind you and it would cause such a disruption I will give you an entrance examination if you pass it I will let you in.
The test is short, but you have to pass it before you can get into Heaven; "kool man" said the dread. Iman hope seh de tess no haad. Life tuff enough test as it was, u seet!
St. Peter continued, 'Yes, I know,
but the test is only three questions. Here they are:
First:
What two days of the week begin with the letter T?
"That one easy. That would be Tiday and Tamorro."
The Saint's eyes opened wide and he exclaimed, that is not what I was thinking, but you do have a point, and I guess I did not specify, so I will give you credit for that answer.
Second:
How many seconds are there in a year asked St.. Peter.?
How many seconds inna year sar?
Now that one haada,' replied RasI, 'but Iman think about that, and Iman seh de only answer can be twelve.'
Astounded, St. Peter said, 'Twelve?
how in Heaven's name could you come up with twelve seconds in a year?'
"Well it got to be twelve", he replied: watch ya now spar, U hav January 2nd, February 2nd, March 2nd...
'Hold it,' interrupts St. Peter. 'I see where you are going with this, and I see your point, though that was not quite what I had in mind....but I will have to give you credit for that one, too
Third:
What is God's first name?'
A Sure,' he replied with a big grin . .
is Andy!
'Andy?' exclaimed an exasperated and frustrated St Peter. Ok, I can understand how you came up with your answers to my first two questions, but just how in the world did you come up with the name Andy as the first name of God?'
St. Peter continued, 'Yes, I know,
but the test is only three questions. Here they are:
First:
What two days of the week begin with the letter T?
"That one easy. That would be Tiday and Tamorro."
The Saint's eyes opened wide and he exclaimed, that is not what I was thinking, but you do have a point, and I guess I did not specify, so I will give you credit for that answer.
Second:
How many seconds are there in a year asked St.. Peter.?
How many seconds inna year sar?
Now that one haada,' replied RasI, 'but Iman think about that, and Iman seh de only answer can be twelve.'
Astounded, St. Peter said, 'Twelve?
how in Heaven's name could you come up with twelve seconds in a year?'
"Well it got to be twelve", he replied: watch ya now spar, U hav January 2nd, February 2nd, March 2nd...
'Hold it,' interrupts St. Peter. 'I see where you are going with this, and I see your point, though that was not quite what I had in mind....but I will have to give you credit for that one, too
Third:
What is God's first name?'
A Sure,' he replied with a big grin . .
is Andy!
'Andy?' exclaimed an exasperated and frustrated St Peter. Ok, I can understand how you came up with your answers to my first two questions, but just how in the world did you come up with the name Andy as the first name of God?'
'Ratid, that was the easiest one of all u kno St.bradda,'
When Iman waak by de church dem, mi hear dema sing
ANDY WALKS WITH ME, ANDY TALKS WITH ME, When Iman waak by de church dem, mi hear dema sing
ANDY TELLS ME I AM HIS OWN.'
St. Peter opened the Pearly Gates,
and said: 'Run, man, run!!!'
Wherefor we pray Lord, Give me a sense of humor,
Give me the ability to understand a clean joke,
To get some humor out of life,
And to pass it on to other folks !
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