A passive person. A yes-man. When you never stand up for yourself or what you believe in, when you are risk-averse and avoid conflict at all costs, when you don’t speak your mind freely and you don’t call out blatant bullshit when you encounter it…
When all you do is passively go through life, trying not to make waves, not to rock the boat, not to make enemies… you suffer, more than anyone in life.
Because you’re not a genuine person — you have sacrificed your personhood in exchange for peace and quiet. But you don’t even find peace and quiet, instead you’re tasked more and more. Your boss demands more of you. Your spouse demands more of you, as do your kids, your friends. Everyone walks all over you. You’re a doormat. And being walked on is your purpose in life.
No one suffers as much in life as the person who tries desperately to avoid suffering, by giving everyone what they want. By trying to be the best, the kindest, the most considerate, at the expense of your own happiness. When all you do is sheepishly go along with whatever the prevailing narrative is, when arguments scare you and conflict frightens you to death… you end up being taken for a ride by everyone you encounter, one way or another.
Passive, soft-spoken and non-confrontational people-pleasers suffer most in life. The ones who, as kids, would speak so softly when asked to answer a question by the teacher that no one could understand a word they said, and never grew out of that phase… they suffer, because in this world, the herbivores get eaten by the predators. And there’s an awful lot of predators in life, and boy are they hungry…
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