I love it here.
I came to Phuket as a sailor 30 years ago and even at that age of 23, I knew that I would retire here.
And then I spent my life preparing to retire here.
I studied Asian languages and culture and religion in college after the military, read every book I could find about Thailand and Vietnam and Southeast Asia, became a Scholar of Southeast Asian Religion, and military history, and at age 50 I flew here on a jet aircraft from New York City.
Not perfect. Far cheaper and safer here than in America, except that driving here is super dangerous.
The people that I've encountered that hate living here are men who came here to find a wife and looked for her at a bar or women that came here with their husband, and the husband began to partake of the greener grass, because her tactics, looks, and attitude could not compete against what the local girls had on offer.
Or the guys that came here as a teacher, or for work, perhaps, that were lonely that met some younger woman who basically scammed them for money- even if she wasn't working at a bar.
Because it is in the nature of the Thai people and their culture, in general, to be opportunistic, and hierarchical with the desire to use and display any power and wealth that they have… and the strong feed on the weak here. That is a recurring theme you see at all levels.
Or, there's a certain kind of Westerner that is not open to the chosen culture that they moved overseas to live in and are surrounded by, these are people who came here and were lonely and (because they didn't speak Thai) only met the people that were open to meeting foreigners (and also spoke English)- who were women who work at a bar.
The average Thai college student might know how to speak pretty decent English but because her culture emphasizes marrying a rich Thai man and not a foreigner 10 or more years her senior, it's almost impossible for an older foreigner to meet and date a college-age girl here…
Unless of course, she is also turning tricks on the side (which happens even among the good girls here) because it's very easy to make money prostituting yourself, if you are a half decent looking woman.
There's a whole hidden economy here involving college girls hooking up with older guys to pay for their college that their parents can't really afford… and if their parents can't afford it then they use that money to buy the latest iPhone or laptop, or tablet for the status. This bothers some people, who would impose their culture, and values, and beliefs on this country.
Unless… that college-age girl is 26 to mid thirties and has multiple kids that she's looking for support for, (because her Thai husband or boyfriend has bailed on her- that happens a lot) and usually these women are working at a bar, speak pretty decent English and can give the older man the time of their life that they can't get in America or Australia or the UK.
When I was living in America literally young women would say or hint things like “wow you're old, why don't you just die already?”
People that hate it here are sometimes the culturally isolated….unwilling or unable to learn to read and write and speak Thai.
If you're in a western country like Italy, or Germany or France, you have some common root words and can get your idea across (and most people speak some English) but here maybe 10% of the people speak English well enough to have a conversation. Most of those people teach English, or are college girls learning English.
English is taught in schools, here, but hardly anyone gets enough time with a native English speaker to practice it well.
So if you speak Thai, even basic Thai, it is a lot easier. If you do not, you are not going to be able to read the signs in the Thai alphabet, period.
I think Chiang Mai is a lot easier to live than in Bangkok, or the party beach towns, or the tourist trap islands….you're going to get a lot of crime Street crime, scam crime, in all those areas because they're preying on the sexpat tourist, or the epic lifetime vacation families that have never been here, do not know how cheap things really are, how to conduct themselves, and that you cannot trust anyone here, especially foreigners who want to befriend you, because they are from your country.
The news here last week was full of the story where an Indian Tourist was scammed because he went to a bar, and an Indian man met him, spoke to him, and said he knows the owner of the bar, best to drink here, to “Not get scammed.”
The scammer got the victim from india to pay for his drinks, scammer’s drinks, & scammers thai girlfriend’s drinks.
At the end of the night, the Target victim was charged almost 300 dollars. The Scammer said, Hey, I know the owner, Let me talk to him, I will get you a 20% discount. No worries, friend.
Target handed over his money, expecting change. Thai girlfriend went to the bathroom, and out a side door, Scammer went out a side door.
Time passes and the victim goes to the bar owner… Bar owner does not know the scammer. Out 300.00, and still owes the bar bill.
In a happy ending, the Police were called, and the offending parties were arrested, blowing their scammed money in a restaurant nearby. The scammer had been an expired visa overstay illegally for almost “two years.”
Scams here, all the time. That is why some people hate it here. Being shortchanged, or your money just pocketed and stolen by some scam.
Another reason why people hated here as you can't just come here and get a job as a taxi driver or work in a restaurant or something you could do if you were moving to for example New York, or Los Angeles, someplace that has more open employment.
Many professions are literally Barred here to foreigners… but if you have a degree, you can find work as a teacher.
or perhaps in a high-profile company in Bangkok.
Coming here it takes preparation a lot of paperwork and setting up to get whatever long-term Visa you want to permanently live here.
Some people tout the Byzantine regulations of immigration, but I've never had a problem with immigration because I just hire a Visa agent.
I have to give them power of attorney to handle my Affairs & pay them some money and they handle my 90-day check-ins and they handle my yearly visa and it's not a problem…
but I know people who have this kind of paranoia that they don't want to give someone power of attorney- they don't want to report every 90 days they don't want to do X Y and Z. They complain that the rules always change, the paperwork always changes, and it is up to the discretion of the officer whose desk you are sitting at…. and I think of it as…
Once a year for a week my passport is suspended while it's getting extended.
Once every three months, I take a trip to the mall for about 3 hours and I do some mall shopping while my 90-day check-in is being processed.
Sometimes I've seen a movie.
I never had that thought. But are these people who are sex criminals in America who are worried that they're going to get found out?
Or what's the problem? I don't understand it.
I do know for sure that a lot of people come here to hide out. if you have money, you could stash yourself here for a very, very long time, and not be discovered.
But, living here….to me… as a military veteran there are certain things that are required:
like shining your shoes
wearing a clean uniform
Bathing when your unit has water
…. and so for someone to say yes you must report to immigration every 90 days?
okay cool, where's it at? okay, I know where it is. I'm going to do it.
okay…I did it.
It's done.
The benefits of living here… relaxed days, peace of mind, personal safety when walking around at night far outweigh any inconveniences that I have run into.
Some people don't like the rats eating the garbage in the city but the cats keep that down.
Some people don't like the dogs eating the cats in the City but… the strong prey on the weak here.
If you arrive here as a 65-year-old man with $100,000, and no monthly pension, other than SSA, and no insight into Buddhism, or the culture or the language or Asian indirect philosophy, seeking a wife, you're making a mistake.
If you arrive here with an attitude that this is a third world country and it's dirty and there's low water pressure and the water carries diseases and you need everything to be scrupulously clean, you're making a grave mistake.
But if you have taken the time to learn some basic Thai to build on from cassette or CD courses and have prepared and don't wear your heart on your sleeve and take life as it comes and don't blow your money once you arrive here… you can live a pretty good life if you don't party or drink too much and don't chase false dreams.
When I first came here as a 23-year-old sailor I was told that it is adult Disneyland and to make any dream come true all you got to do is pay money.
Some people come here chasing that dream and they pay their money until they lose it and they lose sight of their goal which was to live here long-term.
Hard to explain but I know that people who have lived here a while completely understand everything I have written.
I personally am in contact with half-a-dozen people who make YouTube videos about living here long-term, and they would very likely agree with most of what I've written.
I think I'm in a special category because I came here 30 years ago… and then I took 27 years to prepare and now I just live a quiet life- I don't smoke, I don't drink, I don't party… and I keep myself occupied with activities that don't cost me anything and so I live very cheaply.
To anyone that intends to come here for long-term:
Read absolutely everything you can find.
Watch absolutely every video you can find, and use that as a base…
Because, like combat, once you get here there are so many things you can only learn by doing…
living here and listening to the advice of other people who have lived here for years, but make your own opinions based on your values and beliefs.
Thailand is not for everyone… but for some, it is a somewhat flawed Paradise.
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