How did you know you suffer with depression?

The Dark knowledge

Answered by 

Jasmine

 

Sat

How did you know you suffer with depression?

Do you know who she is?

She’s Dakota Johnson, and she’s widely known for her Fifty Shades series, Need for Speed, and her upcoming movie Madame Web. I find her to be pretty cute.

Well, she did this movie called Cha Cha Real Smooth, which is a Rom-Com type movie. She has a really good dialogue in that movie which perfectly defines what depression is.

Well, she hit the jackpot with that dialogue, didn’t she?

*Depression. has. literally. affected. every. fucking. area. of. my. life.*

From academics to friends to family to sleep to health.

Seriously, your mind can be your own worst enemy.

For the past two years, my life has been deteriorating. The worst part about it is that I am 21 years old. Most of the people around my age are having a good time with their life. And I'm 21 and I was fucking depressed for a large portion of my college life, which is a period supposed to be filled with enjoyment cuz these years won’t come back.

But then you know, there isn’t an age for depression. It can happen at any moment in your life, but it's your choice to fight it though. But we all are tired of fighting every day, aren’t we?

This is how it felt like for a long time,

1. Unable to enjoy anything
   I loved watching movies, socializing, and going out.
   It all just seems meaningless after a while.
2. No proper sleep
   I would take 2 hours just to fall asleep
   only to not feel like waking up the next day.
3. Messed up diet
   I would mostly eat junk food and items
   that would fulfill my dopamine urges.
4. Unable to focus on anything for a long time
   In the middle of lectures, my mind would divert
   and I would be thinking about something else
   entirely.
5. Increased Sexual urges
   Again to fulfill my dopamine urges I started indulging
   in a lot of pornography, which is unhealthy. I’m not ashamed
   honestly.
6. Entering a random train of thought at any given point in time
   I would be walking back from the cafeteria to my hostel and I
   would find myself spending an extra 30 minutes walking just
   to think about something useless.
7. Making extreme choices
   I would make choices in the binary sense,
   either all in or all out. I wouldn’t take small
   steps toward the same goal.
8. Smoking
   All the mess that my brain and I had made
   of itself resorted to smoking now and then,
   just to feel peaceful.
9. Lack of clarity
   I was very confused most of the time about
   what particular action to take moving forward.
   Being confused can mess things up.
10. Overthinking
    The art of creating problems that don’t even
    fucking exist.
11. No motivation to move forward
    Half the time you’re so consumed fighting
    your thoughts, that you don’t have
    the mindset to progress.
12. Misunderstandings
    Most of my friends(and other people)
    would misinterpret my isolation/silence
    /ignorance for me having an attitude
    or being selfish.
13. Guilt
    I would feel shitty about who I am
    and why am I like this. I felt guilty about
    being such a shitty son to my parents.
14. Very negative thoughts
    Even when I made the slightest effort towards
    doing something meaningful, my brain would
    flood with thoughts about me being a big failure.
15. You just don’t feel like existing, because all you feel is lifeless.

Yeah, that's about it.

Many of these points are interconnected.

That is what is what depression is for me.

We all have a new journey, and you have no idea what life has in store for you. So keep going!

Hope you liked my answer.

Stay Happy 💕